I want a man who's handsome, smart and strong
One who loves to listen long.
One who thinks before he speaks
One who'll call, not wait for weeks.
And when I spend his cash,
He not be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door,
massages my back and begs to do more.
Oh! For a man who makes love to my mind
And knows the answer to "how big is my behind?"
I want this man to love me to no end,
And always be my very best friend.
I want a deaf-mute nymphomaniac
with huge boobs who owns a liquor store
and a bass boat.
I know this doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit